Not So Dead Anymore
by Karesu-Gaara-Mikosu
Summary: Roxas feels like he could never love again when his best friend dies. But is he truely dead or not? Vamp fic. AU. AkuRoku. RikuSora.
1. Chapter 1

**Name: Not So Dead Anymore**

**By: Karesu G. Mikosu**

**Summary: Maybe death is a more temporary state then we thought**

**Warnings: Axel/Roxas, Riku/Sora**

**Rating: T**

**A/N: Okay, this idea hit me around 11pm and I wrote it until 12:39pm so if it was a bad idea or the writing sucks... sorry... for anyone that does like it... I will love you forever. Please Review.**

**EDIT: I went back and I redid a lot of stuff in this, I am more proud of it now! Plus, I added another character into it so I am happy. Enjoy.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own KH**

"Do you really hate me that much?" A shaky voice could be clearly heard, "You know what? I bet you really do hate me, can not stand me in the slightest can you? Then here comes another question, why did you hate me so much to do this to me? Yeah I know that it really isn't a fair question, but at least its one that needs answering. I know, you can think of a million things more important things for me to ask you then why. Okay if you can, I would like to hear what I should ask you."

There was a moment of silence when this was said, "Ah yes, so true. I should be asking you not why, but for what reason, meaning the same thing by the way, I should be asking what was on your mind, I should be asking when you thought about it, asking about when you did the actual deed, I should ask you how, now why, why would be too simple. You hate me because I understand you, I can imagine why, why you committed suicide."

A bitter laughed passed through chapped lips as eyes vivid blue eyes locked with the wording on a gray stone placed on the ground, making the place where someone who was once alive now eternally rested. The carved out words stared back at him without a care in the world.

_Axel Flame_

_Age 18_

_Died January 1 2000_

A Son

A friend

No one bothered to put 'good' before those two sentences, no one cared enough to do so or pay the few extra dollars to inscribe it in the stone. He cared, he cared a hell of a lot, but he wasn't the one who took care of the red-heads funeral. He was the only one who cared, although Axel's father had payed for the funeral, he didn't bother showing up. His mother on the other hand at least came, not really shedding a tear, but at least she had gone.

He was there, and it almost seemed like he was the only one who cried. Now mind you he was not very soft at heart or anything, it was more like he was the only one in love with Axel Flame. Roxas Silas was teased ruthlessly about his relationship with Axel, people teased them about going out with one another all the time. Axel decided to look upon it as a joke, laugh and hug Roxas calling him 'lover' or something of the sort, always making the blonde boy blush.

"You know Axel, its been a while... its new years day... its 2006 now, at 1am none the less... I miss you more then ever... just graduated college, same time as Sora did, but I didn't make valid Victorian like me did either. You used to tease him about being a geek... but hey at least it got him somewhere right? You know a long time ago, when people used to tease us about being gay? Figured out I am, thought I was bi for a little bit, got a girlfriend named Namine, but that didn't last very long. Its strange, every time I even think about dates, my mind starts to wander to those jokes about us being in love with one another... and I guess I am in love with you.

"Yeah I know what your reaction to that would be like, I would get smacked over the head and be called an idiot for it taking me eight years to figure it out, and to wait to tell it to you when you were dead even, oh the nerve I have! Yeah... I could just see you doing that now... but I don't know what you would do after that... guess I never will."

He sighed to himself when he finished his little speech, looking down at the gave of his lost love, someone he would never see again in his life. Some days death seemed welcome, just to escape it all, but the he knew what someone's suicide could do to someone they hold close, and he knew he could not do that to Sora. Caught in his own musings he didn't hear the footsteps coming up from behind him.

"Like this?" a deep, but seemingly familiar voice, came from behind him. Roxas felt a fist tap his head, making him turn around in confusion. "Roxas, you are a idiot and I can not believe that you waited eight years to say that to me, and even waiting till my death to do it? Oh the nerve you have blondie!" Roxas growled out when he was not Axel, but Riku standing there in his place.

"Oh thank you Riku! My goodness, not only did you have no going there for a second or two, you had to nerve to listen into my conversation with Axel! I bet he would be annoyed with your rude behavior! You two just always got on each others nerves, and now I have to deal with you making Sora cry over you three months ago when you..." Roxas stopped right there in the middle of his rant, "... left."

"Oh yeah, Sora didn't tell you? I got back yesterday." The silver haired man said with a smile on his face. "I just came down here to make sure that you didn't kill yourself at Axel's grave or anything stupidly romantic or anything. You can be such a sap sometimes Roxas." he laughed lightly at his own comment.

"Yeah whatever, I don't really care what you and Sora think, he was my best friend so I am entitled to a day of sorrow without people interrupting me." He said glaring at the taller boy.

"Friend? From what I heard it was something a little bit more then that." Another voice called from behind Riku. The first thing that Roxas saw was shocking red hair and his heart skipped a beat, his heart aching it to really be Axel. "Then again I figured that out a long time ago, even told that little brat brother of mine, but would be believe that he was so lucky? No luck." Reno came out of the darkness.

"Why do you guys have to surround me?" Roxas growled out looking at the two boys in front of him. He really wanted Reno to be Axel, but that wasn't going to happen anytime soon. They both had the same shocking red hair and playful attitudes, but Reno was older and a little more serious then his brother. Roxas just thought that both of them were insane.

"Because it is our goal to make your life miserable." Both of them said at the same time.

"I hate you both... Fine I will leave for now because I know that is what Sora sent the likes of you down here to do." Roxas said, placing a red rose on the grave and walked away from the cold stone surface. The wind rushed through the trees at a rapid pace, and no one noticed the lone figure in the darkness watching this with piercing emerald eyes.

**So, what did you think? Good, bad, or if you read the first draft, better then last time? Oh well, I think that this is better, although a bit shorter. I will attempt to update soon, but school is starting up so I am NOT promising anything. I get yelled at by people if I promise something. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Name: Not So Dead Anymore**

**By: Karesu G. Mikosu**

**Summary: Maybe death is a more temporary state then we thought**

**Warnings: Axel/Roxas, Riku/Sora**

**Rating: T**

**A/N: I didn't want to be killed... so I updated. At first I went through maybe... 35 false starts on this chapter but once I got the right one it just... came to me! If you don't like it then too bad, I worked hard on this chapter just for your enjoyment and I don't really care if you don't like it or not. I GET POINTS FOR TRYING! I love you people who do like it though, or at least apriciate my trying to do something! Please Reveiw!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own KH**

"_Roxas" A soft voice whispered in the darkness, "You underestimate me, my love." Those words sent a shiver down the blonde boys spine. He couldn't see anything, just the little patch of light he was under. "You presume me dead, when you know full well that I am anything besides dead!" _

_He couldn't speak, how he wanted to speak, scream, anything! That voice belonged to the only person that could make him feel, that voice belonged to Axel. Was this a dream? He couldn't tell... he couldn't tell anything anymore. _

"_Don't encase yourself in sorrow Roxas, that would not be good for either of us. I am not dead, as much as I know you are going to protest that I am. I can't wait to see the look on your face when I can see you again, my contract is almost up! I have waited six years for this Roxas, and I won't let you get depressed while I have to wait. Years... way to many years Roxas." The voice went on. Two emerald spheres could now be seen, looking down at the blonde._

"_You... hate... me..." Roxas finally said, voice echoing just how shaken he was at the moment._

_A dark chuckle could be heard from the darkness in respond. "There is a thin line between love and hate, got it memorized?" with that the green depths left his sight._

"_A... Axe... Axel... AXEL!" Roxas screamed reaching out for the other. _

**akurokuisawesomegotitmemorized?**

"AXEL!" Roxas screamed out sitting up in his bed panting. Looking around he noticed that he was in his room, "Damn, another dream." he groaned as he rolled over on his bed and noticed his window was slightly ajar. With a curious eye he got up and closed it, leaning back against the cool glass. "Why can't you just leave me be?" he asked himself before trudging back tot he bed, glancing down at his clock.

3:17 am the numbers glowed happily at him, not caring that their owner was having sleeping trouble and only got to bed at 12:45 after coming home from the graveyard. In blind rage he threw his clock against the wall, making the numbers fade like dying embers of a flame... flame... Axel... he growled in frustration again and threw the nearest object he could find at the already abused clock. The shoe hit the wall with a loud crash, effectively hitting the clock once again. In this process the picture that was hanging above it fell and the glass from the frame shattered.

Roxas' eyes widened as he ran over to where the shattered glass now fell to the floor and picked up the picture. The glowing eyes of his dead friend shown back at him, as if the red-head had no cares in the world. Taking it out of the broken frame he went back over to his bed, holding the image close to his chest and cried himself back to sleep, never noticing the gaze that was upon him again.

**akurokuisawesomegotitmemorized?**

"_I never took you for the crying type Roxas." a certain red-heads voice invaded his ears. The tone that was being used was that of humor, and something that the blonde boy couldn't detect. _

"_Shut up!" This time Roxas could speak, not only listen, "You are just a dream so why the hell should I listen to you anyway?" The younger scowled into the darkness._

"_A dream huh? You have such little faith in my Roxas! I already told you, my contract is almost up then I can see you face-to-face again! Of course it will have to be at night but that isn't going to be a problem I don't think... what do you think?" Axel asked, coming into the light this time instead of lurking in the shadows again. His thin body was clad in a black jacket that reminded Roxas of the matrix._

"_What I think is that I should wake-up and forget that your sorry ass ever came into my life." The blue eyed boy responded, venom coating every syllable. _

"_Yet I am not the one throwing their alarm clock around." a chuckle came as he saw the blush appear on Roxas's lips. "On another note, I don't think that you are sorry at all that I can into your life." It felt as if his lips were right next to his ear as he said this. A shiver went down Roxas's spine. He was about to look over and cling to Axel when..._

**akurokuisawesomegotitmemorized?**

"ROXAS! Come on!" he could hear Sora banging on his door. A groan escaped his lips as he looked at the ceiling in annoyance"Do not make me come in there Blondie!" his brother growled at him from the other side of his door. "This year I will NOT let you be depressed!" he declared.

"Fine I am coming you annoying twit!" Roxas yelled back at him and got up to get dressed, deciding that if he didn't get up the brunette was never going to leave him alone.

"That is better! We are leaving soon to go to that new Amusement park! Oh by the way it's noon! Get down here quickly!" Sora said and skipped away from his brothers door. Another sigh escaped Roxas' lips as he pulled on his clothing, making sure to also slip on one of Axel's old jackets.

**akurokuisawesomegotitmemorized?**

When they got there, they meaning Sora, Riku, Reno, Seifer, Hayner, and himself, Sora was going on about how he couldn't wait for the fireworks display they were having that night. Roxas tuned him out and most of the world around him. This worked for a little bit until a certain friend of his noticed.

"No way are you allowed to be depressed today Roxas!" Hayner said glaring at him deeply, "Thats the whole reason we are HERE so you will FORGET for a little bit! Jesus Christ!"

"Yeah I know... I will attempt to have some fun, but I refuse to promise anything!" he said, but by now he couldn't hide the small grin on his lips.

"That's the spirit short-one!" Reno piped up, slinging a arm around his shoulder, "giving us your usual uncertain promises! I think we will force him to have fun yet!" The rest of the group laughed, including Roxas himself.

**akurokuisawesomegotitmemorized?**

The day was spent on rides and games and now it was time for the fireworks. A huge group of people were gathered at the park main entrance anticipating the display that was about to go on. Roxas had accidentally had fun today, with only a few fleeting thoughts of 'Axel would have loved this' running through his mind. He stared at the night sky waiting with the rest of the crown before them. He momentarily looked down to snag another piece of the Funnel Cake him and Sora were sharing, when he saw a flash of red. He knew Reno was right-beside him so who... his head sped up as he ran in the direction he had seen it.

The group called him name but he couldn't hear it as he went through the crowd, looking with hopeful eyes. When getting to the edge of the crowd he saw nothing, disappointment etched itself onto his crest-fallen face. Finally Seifer caught up to him.

"Hey man, what's wrong?" He asked, worry evident in his voice.

"Oh it's nothing... I just thought I saw someone that I know..." he said walking back to their group. A burst of brilliant silver and gold illuminated the sky, the crowd cheering because the show was starting, but Roxas could no longer enjoy it.

**A/N: I don't know... I just think that Sora would be fascinated by fireworks! I know I am! I also self-narrate the demise of cookies being dunked in milk and then eaten... but I am just strange like that. I hope you enjoyed this more them I enjoyed writing it because this chapter, in my mind, is BAD! Oh well, love you guys! Review?**


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